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Feb 15, 2014

LET IT GO!!

Screen shot 2014-03-03 at 1.35.53 PMHere we are...mid February. How many of you have stuck to your New Years resolutions? I know I would have bombed mine, BIG time by now...if I had made any. That's why I don't! Those resolutions are just too much pressure! I get all worked up and anxiety ridden over some stupid added "rule" I've placed on myself. Nope, I'm done with those.

This year...I'm all about new beginnings. 2013 was a year of many ups and downs for my little clan on our plot of land we call "the ranch". We had some amazingly fun times, but we were also laden with heartbreak...{more on that in another post.} I'm so glad 2014 is here and starting off well. I'm sooo looking forward to this new venture with my girl Jenn. I've never blogged before, in fact I have to admit...I'm a lurker! One of those people. {but I still love you if you happen to be a lurker too, I just want you to say hello} I read a bunch but rarely comment. My introverted nature...{Ok that's an excuse}...My FEAR of what others think of me has kept me quiet...but this is a fresh start for me and I'm changing my old ways.

In fact, I see a theme that God is working on with me...I don't really want to face it, but I know it's best for me...He's working on my fear! I have A LOT, mostly over things I can't control. He's been nudging me over several areas for awhile now. Sometimes I'm slow...or rebellious...but I've finally decided to let it go and embrace the new beginnings.

I bravely let go while I watched my oldest head off to a new school this January. She was brave and strong, confident in herself and elated for this new beginning in her life. I waved goodbye, swallowing the lump in my throat. I was no longer in control of her day {like I was anyway, right?}. But now I can't control the kids she spends time with or protect her from harm while she is away. God has been asking me to let go of homeschool for our oldest for awhile now. I'm happy to say, I finally listened, I let go and it has been the most freeing experience. I had actually fooled myself into thinking that I could protect my children better than God could. It wasn't out loud or even on purpose, but as I examined my motives and certain circumstances, I realized I was being ridiculous. {btw, this isn't about school options. Homeschool was the best choice for us and something God called us to for a season...but it's over now.} So, I'm letting it go and I'm LOVING it. She is thriving in her new environment and I couldn't be happier for her. {and me}

Screen shot 2014-03-03 at 1.36.07 PM

So now as I let go of my fear and step into this new adventure with Jenn, I'm trusting God to make it into what He wants. I'm letting go of my fear of all of you and jumping in. Thanks for taking the time to get to know me. I look forward to getting to know you!

{Jess}

Comments

That's beautiful.

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